


Secret Love Song

by faliceplease



Category: Little Mix, One Direction
Genre: F/M, Secret Love Song, Song writing, get weird
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-02
Updated: 2016-05-02
Packaged: 2018-06-05 19:57:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6720814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/faliceplease/pseuds/faliceplease
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lourrie inspired secret love song one shot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Secret Love Song

Perrie didn't know how it happened, all she knew was that she was glad it had. It wasn't like it was out of character for her, falling for someone who had her feel special, someone who made all those love songs make sense all over again. 

She just didn't know why it had to be so complicated, he wasn't somebody she could hold hands with in public, someone she could gush over in interviews, or post a dozen selfies with. She couldn't do that, and there were so many reasons why. 

She could probably list half a dozen off the top of her head, the fact that he's famous, the fact that he has history with her ex, the fact that he's not supposed to be with her. If he was, then it would all be easy, wouldn't it?

She didn't want to feel this way for somebody she couldn't be with, the one person who was perfect for her. He was so close yet so far away and that drove her up the wall. Her friends know that she has feelings for somebody, they think he's somebody else. She hadn't lied, but Jade had just assumed, and she didn't correct her. 

Jesy has Jake, Jade has Jed and Leigh Anne has Jordan, but who did she have? An asshat ex fiancé, and a man she couldn't be with, yay for Perrie. She wasn't in the mood to write cheerful tunes about being weird, or having the time of your life. She just wasn't, which was why at 3am all she could think about was how much she wanted to be with him, how much she wished things could be easy, like they were for other couples. She wanted that so badly. 

It's not like this was a crush, she knew he felt the same way, or at least those kisses had made it feel like he did. She couldn't be certain, boys were confusing, they often caused more confusion than anything. 

She tapped her fingers against the strings of her guitar wishing for some inspiration to fall from the raining skies outside. The guitar wasn't helping, and neither was the tea she'd been sipping from for the past twenty minutes. 

She's not violent, but her notebook is soon hitting the wall with a loud bang, and her hands cover her face in frustration. 

"Why can't we be like that?" She groaned out, thinking about all of the couples in her life. She didn't want to be the only one who couldn't be with someone. She had that once, she had the man of her bloody dreams, and it had all turned to shit so quickly. Why couldn't she have love again, was that her only chance?

Why can't I say that I'm in love? She thought to herself, thinking about how she wanted to scream it out to the world, I love Louis fooking Tomlinson! 

She walked over to her notebook that lay open on her tiled floors. She wrapped her fingers around her pen, squeezing it tighter and tighter as if she could squeeze out the inspiration it had hiding inside. 

"Every time I see you I die a little more." She scribbled down, thinking about how obvious it was that they were meant to be together. Every bloody second of the day she fell deeper for him, but it was all just so hopeless. 

Why can't you hold me in the street?  
Why can't you kiss me on the dance floor?

She scribbled down quickly, her messy scrawl was almost too messy to read, but she didn't stop there. 

Why can't we be like that? Coz I'm yours. 

We keep behind closed doors. 

She frowned trying to figure out how to tie all of these feelings together. 

I can't stop these silent tears from rolling down. 

I can't be yours, and you can't be mine. 

We got a love that is homeless. 

A stray tear started falling from her face, frustration building up as she realised how much she wanted to scream, how badly she wished they could just shout it all from the rooftops. 

I don't want to hide us away. 

I wonder if it ever will change, 

I'm living for that day. 

Cause I'm yours.

She kept writing and writing everything she was feeling, crossing things out, changing words around until she was empty, a weight lifted from her shoulders when she realised she'd written three pages, possible lyrics, a song in the making. 

She had to hold herself back from calling Jade and telling her all about her new creation. A hit, she hoped. A public declaration of something she could never make public. 

It neared 7 by the time she fell asleep, clutching her phone against her chest. She'd messaged him, hoping for a response, but her body had decided sleep was more important. 

By the time she was waking up hours later, her phone was buzzing from responses. She ignored all but one message she'd received. 

She knew sending him lyrics had been something special between them for years, even as friends. Louis liked getting feedback, and so did she. She didn't expect him to write his own addition, she had expected a simple, "this is amazing," or "this really doesn't work."

'When you're with him do you call his name, like when you're with me does it feel the same? Would you leave if I was ready to settle down or would you play it safe and stay? girl you know this, we've got a love that is hopeless..'

It felt like a punch to her stomach, was he calling them hopeless or was he just adding to the song? She didn't know which one would hurt more. If he thought this was just words on the screen, or if he felt like they really had no hope. 

Why can't we be like that? 

Cause I'm yours...

She felt the words pouring out down her face, the tears were hot and this was what pain was.


End file.
